Today I was brought back to a simpler time. I went shopping with a girlfriend of mine and thinking of Jessica Biel I was reminded of the television series 7th Heaven. “You know there’s no greater feeling then the love of family ” is a line from the opening theme of the show that rings true especially at this turning point in my life.
Today I came across this dress at Yorkdale mall and wished I had somewhere special I could wear it to.
FYI: Jessica Biel would look amazing in this dress.
I’m brought back in my memory to my prom days. At that time my Gr.8 Graduation dress was a purple/blue color as pictured below:
Then we had the Gr.11 semi formal where I rocked this dress:
And finally we have my Gr.12 Prom dress. My date was my best friend Matt (aka. Matty). We agreed to go together at the Tim Hortons by my house over a bowl of chili. Goodtimes:
My hair was done by the same woman who just did my hair Marisa (located in Vaughan at Orchyd Spa). Looking at that dress in Yorkdale my memories came flooding back. I remember I was so nervous when the final song came on at my Gr. 8 graduation because I wanted to at least dance with one out of the four guys I had a crush on. I got up the nerve to ask one of them and to my surprise (really it was a surprise) he said yes! This was the song we danced to:
The difference between then and now is that I had more courage as a teenager then I do as an adult. Maybe it’s because the consequences of my actions mean more now. As I go through this stage of my life (next year I will be turning 30) I have fond memories of all those who have been there for me and who were at some point in my life, people I called good friends. I celebrate those relationships, no matter how fleeting they may have been. When I am your friend, I am your friend forever. Even if we haven’t spoken in a long time. If I consider you a friend I will be there for you.
It’s funny because originally I was planning on writing about the Beatitudes today because I was reminded of them somehow a few days back. I did a presentation in my Gr. 10 religion class on the meaning of each Beatitude. Another word that strikes me: be-atitude. Something I need to accomplish in my life is give the right people a taste of my attitude. I think my party dresses say it all. A picture is worth a thousand words and tells you how I felt at that time of my life. This was me today:
Shout out to the rando behind me posing for the picture! This was taken in Hudson’s Bay at Yorkdale. Sometimes I like pretending I’m a tourist in my own country. On some levels I am because I haven’t seen everything that Canada has to offer.
I have been in 6 unhealthy relationships and part of the problem was me being unable to set boundaries and leave when it was clear this person is not someone I want to spend my life with. There is a poem from the book Chicken Soup For The Teenage Soul that I love and conveys this feeling:
After a While
After a while you learn the subtle difference between holding a hand and chaining a soul,
And you learn that love doesn’t mean leaning and company doesn’t mean security,
And you begin o learn that kisses aren’t contracts and presents aren’t promises,
And you begin to accept your defeats with your head up and your eyes open, with the grace of an adult, not the grief of a child,
And you learn to build all your roads on today because tomorrow’s ground is too uncertain for plans.
After a while you learn that even sunshine burns if you get too much.
So plant your own garden and decorate your own soul, instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers.
And you learn that you really can endure…
That you really are strong,
And you really do have worth.
- Veronica A. Shoffstall
So on this Sunday, the holy day I ask you to look in the mirror and tell yourself how handsome or beautiful you are. How strong you are. How you can endure, how you can heal. Remember the good times and smile to yourself.
There is nothing wrong with being confidant. Maybe my 7th relationship will be the right one.
- Vanessa Vallozzi